Don’t You Know, Viggo? In America, 3rd Party Votes are Black Magic (A Satire Poem)

Mr. Mortensen, I read that you’re endorsing Jill Stein

You may have friends, but now you’re no friend of mine

I’m the de facto American 2-Party System

And if you’re a REAL patriot, then you’ll only vote within them

I mean, there are a hundred arguments for why voting 3rd party is dumb

Just for whiny-baby ethics voters, sucking on their thumbs

But, aren’t you from upstate New York? Hell, that’s like being half-Canadian

And you’re voting like your Canadian half, not the half that’s ‘Murican

 

You must think that you’re smart, Viggo… reading Camus— speaking Italian and French

But in this Country’s political dialogue, your intellect doesn’t gain you an inch

Don’t you realize that your Stein vote is only a throw-away

And the right time for a protest vote DEFINITELY isn’t on Election Day

I read your published letter that endorses Jill Stein

But, “Speaking truth to power,” won’t earn your candidate Big Bank dimes

 

Viggo, don’t you understand the facts

And how a citizen in the voting booth should act

Trump supporters assert that 3rd Party votin’

Is basically just an indirect vote for old “pay-to-play” Clinton

And Hillary lovers say voting 3rd party only gives a bump

To their sworn enemy— the “racist, xenophobic, misogynistic, pussy-grabbing” Trump

So, basically, if you cast a vote for Stein or Johnson

You’re paradoxically, at the same time, casting a vote for both Trump and Clinton

Though you only vote for one, you’re somehow also voting for the other two

Making your vote, according to the pundits, only work against you

Mr. Mortensen, you better own up to the sad truth, though it’s tragic

Don’t you know, Viggo? In America, 3rd Party votes are black magic


 

My fellow Americans, tomorrow is the big day. Vote your conscience after considering all of your options in due diligence.  Also, if you choose not to vote for some ethical position, that is fine too. This election has done so much to divide us. Never have I witnessed a more fractured USA in my lifetime. Let’s do our best to be kind to one another, even when our political opinions differ.

To Mr. Mortensen, thank you for taking an unpopular stand for your chosen candidate and presenting your reasons in a well-written, and dare I say, truly patriotic fashion.

To read the mentioned endorsement letter, click this link:

Viggo’s Jill Stein endorsement letter

If you are not familiar with Viggo Mortensen, check out the following link as well:

Viggo Mortensen Wiki

As always, thank you to anyone who reads and/or shares my blog. -Luke

 

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